Passing motion

Satiricus has horrible memories of passing motions. When he was a little tyke, his mother was a fervent believer and practitioner of regularly making sure that her brood took castor oil, senna pod or Epsom salts. The induced motions were good for the blood, she swore – even as she swore even louder at her snivelling offspring. What made the medicine even more bitter to swallow was that one had to have at least three motions before one could have something to eat. It appears that the opposition controlled Assembly is as fervent a believer in passing motions as Satiricus’ sainted mother.
“Ai man, me confused,” complained Cappo. “Wha abee gat guvement fah, when de opposition a change everything?”
“When man mek heself sugar, he mattie ah suck am,” pronounced Bungi. After two weeks of rest from cane cutting he was feeling very good. “Pressie try to please de opposition and dem tek am fuh weakness.”
“Now if Pressie didn’t offer to consult with the opposition, everybody woulda be on his case,” Suresh pointed out. “The man consult and everybody still on he case!”
“But a wha all dis motion de opposition a pass?” Cappo’s forehead was furrowed. “De only motion me know a when me guh to de latrine!” Everybody grinned. Cappo and his lavatory travails were legend.
“Well in Parliament, a motion is just a proposal by a member for the house to decide on something,” advised Teacher Samad. “And after debate the House will make the decision.”
“But da na mek sense,” protested Cappo. “Now dat de opposition gat one seat majority, dey can do anything!”
Kuldeep had been listening quietly and he now joined in. “One belly-full na fatten hag. Let them jump up and down like chicken without he head. Pressie said he will veto whatever he wasn’t involved in!”
“And wha guh happen den?” Cappo still looked worried. “De opposition like shark when he smell blood.”
“It will go back to Parliament and the opposition will have to get a two-thirds majority,” Samad was a fount of information. He knew his social studies.
“Ha!! Moon ah run til day cetch am.” Cappo cackled and slammed the table. “Wha dem guh do den? Dem come right back to Pressie!!”
“But you see, that is the problem,” suggested Suresh. “The opposition don’t know time and place.”
“You right,” agreed Kuldeep. “They coulda bargain with presie right from the start and they coulda work things out. But no!!”
“Dem get too full a dem self,” said Cappo bitterly. “If yuh eye nah see, yuh mouth nah must talk. Dem nevah think Pressie woulda play hard card!”
“So all this motion just like belly wuk?” asked Bungi with a smirk. “Come in one side and gone out de other side!”
“But you see the opposition don’t listen,” proposed Suresh. “The proper procedure to challenge something that they don’t think is right is to go to court.”
“Like the government,” suggested Kuldeep. “You just can’t change whatever you don’t like just because you have one more seat in Parliament.”
Even easy going Satiricus was turned off. “Let’s see how the opposition will deal with pressie’s veto.” He grinned and looked who was always full of proverbs. “Fish ah play ah sea, he nah know watah ah boil fuh am!”
Everybody at the table cracked up.