Lil bit water and no wood is no good

TIMES INT'L

De whole country gon need a lotta prayers soon – from crusade to jhandi to reading to any kinda prayer in any religion. And all dem people who does go to chuch – don’t matter which chuch – gon have to pray fuh Guyana. Too much of pubic language goin on in public places.
Old people done warn a long time already that people mustn’t wash dem dutty linen fuh de public to see. But no body ain’t listenin.
At this rate, if women coulda get pregnant wid talk, all of dem who reach age woulda done get pregnant. And even dem woman who ain’t got pickney yet woulda done mek by now.
De power company gone public wid dem pole problem.
Dem can’t find no wood around de place that long enough, round enough and strong enough fuh hang up de wires to give people power all night long and all day long. So de company plan to bring in strong wood from outside.
But someting must be wrong, because Guyana got plenty wood. Guyana got so much wood that one country even payin Guyana fuh all de wood that de former prezzi show dem. Dem even turn round and tell he that this is good wood and that Guyana must not waste this wood because plenty people want to keep this kinda wood.
De water company gone public and blame de power company fuh not getting enough power to give de people water all night long and all day long. Some ting must be wrong hey again, because Guyana is de land of many waters and yet de people not gettin enough water, so dem want more water.
De combination of lil bit water and no wood is already no good. But to add insult to injury, two big men gone public bout stones. One man claim he got plenty stones and de other man doubt he to de bone.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling… friend tell friend… mattie tell mattie! Only de Almighty can know how one man be so cock sure whether or not de other man got stones!

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