Satiricus was bemused at all the fuss being made about the parking meter installation offered to Georgetown. “This is such a typically Guyanese reaction!” snorted Satiricus to his friend Cappo. “We are so technologically backwards!” They had just settled in their seats at the Back Street Bar and ordered two beers.
“Wha’ mek yuh like cuss abee down, Sato?” asked Cappo plaintively. “Me bin visit me buddy in New Yark, you know. And me na see not’ing fancy wid dem parking meter.”
“Well, that’s what I’m talking about, Cappo,” Satiricus said exasperatedly. “The meter this overseas Guyanese fella Tush bringing to Georgetown isn’t those pieces of pipe in the ground where you have to put in coins.”
“So abee gon tu’n mo’ advance dan ‘merica?” said Cappo with his eyes opened wide. “But me hear Tush gon charge abee “advance” money too! $500 fuh wan hour parking!”
Satiricus slapped the table and nearly toppled Cappo’s beer bottle. “That’s the same thing I can’t understand with you Guyanese!’ he exclaimed. “Tush want to give us better than First World parking and you complaining. Jeez!!”
“Suh if Tush na put pole wid meter in de ground, wha’ he gon do fuh abee park abee cyaar and tek abee “advance” money?” asked Cappo sarcastically.
“Budday, I’m glad you asked,” said Satiricus excitedly. He’d missed Cappo’s sarcasm. “Tush will install invisible laser beams that will intersect to create a parking space. No poles in the ground!”
“Like dem laser beam dat does guard dem bank night time?” queried Cappo with a raised eyebrow. “Me see dat in “Ocean 11″!”
“Yes! Yes!” continued Satiricus impatiently. “And you will pay with your phone credit…or else an alarm will go off.”
“But wha’ gon happen if me stan’ up in waan-a-dem Tush parking place?” said Cappo, downing his beer.
“If you park you tail for an hour, then you’ll have to shell out $500!!” said Satiricus with satisfaction. “High tech cost money, boy!”
“But Sato, tell me somet’ing,” said Cappo softly. “If abee cyaan keep abee street light goin’; you t’ink abee gon keep laser light wukkin’?”
Satiricus became very quiet.
“Suh buy wan nex’ beer, na, Sato!” said Cappo slyly. “An’ tell me mo ‘bout Tush “advance” parkin’”