Knock-off

Satiricus was agog. He’d never seen anything like it before. He’d been sent to cover the goings on in Parliament by his editor. The regular hack had called in sick. Satiricus had more than a sneaking suspicion that the chap knew what was coming down and decided (wisely) – discretion was the better part of valour. But with all the screaming, yelling and finger pointing he’d been most shocked when, with an evil sneer on his face, Ram Jhaat Tan looked over his former colleagues’ benches and declared ‘we gon knock-off each one of you, one by one’.
“In my whole life,” Satiricus confessed to the ‘boys’ around the table, “I never saw so much hate in the face of one man.”
“Budday! I like you but you always behind these things!” replied Hari. “Ram Jhaat Tan whole purpose in life is to bring down this government – but just to see his old comrades out of a job.”
“Sato me friend, na worry about de Jhaat,” advised Cappo with a smile. “Fish ah play ah sea, he nah know watah ah boil fuh am.”
“He always jealous of people like Rodee,” suggested Suresh. “Even when he was in the PPEE, he think he better than them!”
“But mouth open and story jump out!” pointed out Kuldeep. “All this performance is just because he jealous his old friends! What kind a person is this?”
“But alyuh na listen to me,” complained Cappo. “Ram Jhaat should worry about he own job. Like he don’t know he gon get knock off heself, just now?”
“What you mean?” demanded Hari. “The man got his lawyer job.”
“No-Gel Huge and de Naga Man pump he up,” explained Cappo, “but them na need he anymore. Ram Jhaat forget when man done suck cane he does dash peeling pan ground!”
“But I still can’t understand why he hate his old friends so much,” said Satiricus. “I mean he spend years with those people!”
“Sato let me teach yuh wan lesson,” said Cappo as he leaned forward confidentially. “Nah because dog ah play with yuh he nah bite yuh.”
“Yes?” said Satiricus still puzzled.
“De Jhaat ah de kind ah fella who think because he bin ah school, he better than everybody else,” confided Cappo. “I remember him from congress. But de old man used to judge people mo’ by if deh can do de wuk.”
“And Ram Jhaat don’t like to work,” said Hari. “That is why he never got a position in de party.”
“Nah all who guh a church house ah guh fuh pray,” said Cappo sagely. “Some does go fuh full dem pocket.”
“So Ram Jhaat got all this hate just because people with less book knowledge get up in life?” exclaimed Satiricus in wonder. “It’s no wonder he always look so sour!”