He’s baaack!

TIMES INT'L

Satiricus was happy his leader Nagga Man was back in Guyana, all “fit”. He knew the fellas at the Back Street Bar didn’t think him “proper,” or had him high on their hit parade. But Satiricus admired Nagga Man, if for no other reason than he’d imbibed in every rum shop – before they were called “bars” — in Guyana. To do that and still remain “fit” deserved respect!
“Budday, is de cuttas Nagga Man like fuh eat w’en ya drink!” volunteered Cappo, after Satiricus had expressed his opinion upon joining them.
“Yes, me hear Nagga Man too like ‘e fry po’k, when ya drink,” confirmed Bungi.
“So how does that work?” inquired Hari with interest.
“Well, de po’k ile does line ‘e stomick,” explained Cappo, “and de likker cyaan eat ‘e livva out.”
“So how come YOU don’t eat pork cutters?” Satiricus wanted to know. “You only eat fried Banga Mary!”
“Me relig’on na mek me eat po’k,” said Cappo, with a virtuous look on his face.
“But Sato, tell me something,” said Hari. “What the Chronic got against Nagga Man?”
“What you mean?” answered Satiricus. “He’s their boss!”
“Well their headline announcing his return, was ‘He’s back’!!” ” said Hari, as both Cappo and Bungi guffawed loudly when he stretched out the “baaack”.
“What’s wrong with that?” asked Satiricus in confusion.
“Budday you na bin see all dem friken pitcha wid Freddy Krueger?” asked Cappo.
“And wid ev’ry new pitcha, dem does announce, ‘He’s baaack!!’ fu fri’ken abee mo’!” interjected Bungi with glee. “Da man face prappa swingy an’ ugly!!”
“They even had a song for Freddy,” said Hari, as he belted it out, “One, two, Freddy’s coming for you/ Three, four, Better lock your door/ Five, six, grab a crucifix/ Seven, eight, You better stay awake/ Nine, ten, HE’S BACK AGAIN!!!”
“So you think those fellas at Chronic mocking Nagga Man?” asked Satiricus in concern. “His face isn’t THAT swingy.”
“Me t’ink ‘e days done, an’ even dem Chranic bais na respeck Nagga Man now,” said Cappo.
“’E jus’ a wan C’rismuss blow-blow now!” concluded Bungi.

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