Different (arrival) strokes

TIMES INT'L

Satiricus was in an upbeat mood. Yesterday, he and the family had sauntered over to the local ground where his villagers were celebrating Indian Arrival Day. He always went for the traditional foods his wife didn’t cook nowadays at home. It wasn’t that she didn’t like to cook…but with the internet at her beck and call, she preferred to whip up the “Indian” food from India.
“And it’s not that I don’t like them, but I just get a kick from the food my grandmother used to make!” Satiricus reported to the fellas at the Back Street Bar.
“Me know wha’ yuh mean,” said Bungi wryly. “Me wife a mek mutt’n biryani from wan bax…but me still like Bigan-Choka wid Sada Roti now and den!”
“Alyuh lucky!” chuckled Hari wryly. “For me is chowmein and fry rice, down the line!!”
“Suh like only me a get roti and curry ev’ry marnin’!!” said Cappo. “Jus’ like abee ole people who bin come fram India!”
“Cappo, ole friend, you know why you eat ‘tea, breakfast and dinner’?” asked Satiricus.
“Well me gat fuh eat t’ree time a day,” replied Cappo.
“When our fore-parents came from India, they left so early for the backdam they couldn’t eat anything,” said Satiricus. “They just drank some tea – no roti and curry!!”
“Suh da wha’ mek abee ah eat “break-fuss” midday!!” exclaimed Bungi!! “Rice an’ dhall!!”
“That’s right,” chimed in Hari. “Their first real meal was at midday, when the sun ‘stand up’!!”
“Suh if abee ah eat diffren’ fram de ole people,” said Cappo, “abee ah drink diffren’ too?”
“Damn right!” said Satiricus. “They didn’t drink alcohol!”
“No rum an’ beer?” asked Bungi incredulously.
“Nope!” said Satiricus. “That was introduced right here in Guyana.”
“Suh wha’ dem bin do fuh fun?” asked Cappo.
“They smoked grass, which they called “ganja”!!” said Hari.
“Really?” asked Bungi in awe. “Dem ole people bin bad fuh days!!”
“Fram nex’ year, leh abee smoke some ganja fuh Arrival Day!!” said Cappo.
They all clinked bottles to that suggestion.

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