Demerara Bridge is falling down…

Satiricus is a history buff. Most people didn’t know that London Bridge was once a ‘pontoon bridge’ just like his Demerara Bridge. (Satiricus was impatient with the word ‘Harbour’ inserted between ‘Demerara’ and ‘Bridge’: it was just not true! There was no ‘harbour’ at Schoonard.) But he figured that if the British could move from the pontoon bridge the Romans built in 43AD and moved to stone by 1076, surely, Guyana could follow suit in 2012.
‘Listen budday! De PPPcee keep dat bridge on saline fuh 20 years!’ carped Cappo. ‘Me cousin bin a guh New York in de PNCee one time and he and he cyaar float down to Mc Doom!!’
‘So ‘e nearly meet ‘e doom?!’ Bungi chortled. ‘All right! All right! Me know it na funny!’
‘Damn right!’ growled Kuldeep. ‘Lemme tell you how that bunch of jokers screwed up the bridge. Everybody leaned forward. Kuldeep was an engineer. ‘When the white people made the pontoons, they attached small little motors to them. The PNCee party people who operate the bridge kill themselves with laff.’ Kuldeep looked up and smiled.
Cappo smiled back: he seemed to know what was coming.
‘They said what the hell the pontoons need motors for. The bridge wasn’t going for a drive!’ ‘Dem na realise dat the motor was fo mek current fo stop de pontoon from rusting away!’
Cappo couldn’t contain himself. ‘So when de pontoon rusty, dem float away wid me cousin cyaar!’
‘But you know, every bridge can break down,’ said teacher Samad. ‘Remember the old nursery rhyme – London Bridge is falling down… falling down?’
To no one’s surprise, Suresh broke into song: he had been working away with gusto at his beers for quite a while. The gang joined him in chorus, ending with: ‘… My fair lady!!’
‘But seriously fellas,’ interrupted Samad. ‘The rest of the rhyme advised how to build a better bridge from the original wood and clay one.’
And to everyone’s surprise, Teacher Samad broke into song: ‘Build it up with bricks and mortar, Bricks and mortar, bricks and mortar, Build it up with bricks and mortar, My fair lady!’ Getting into the spirit, the rest of the gang all belted out: ‘Bricks and mortar will not stay, Will not stay, will not stay, Bricks and mortar will not stay, My fair lady.
Build it up with iron and steel, Iron and steel, iron and steel, Build it up with iron and steel, My fair lady.’
Bottles clinked all around as everyone in the backstreet dive looked on in amazement.
‘Well, even the real London bridge was eventually replaced in 1962,’ advised Mukesh who had drifted in late.
‘A fella from Arizona bought the old one, shipped it over to America and set it up over there brick by brick.’ ‘Well, when deh replace de floating bridge maybe dem can use all de the section fuh mek bridge fuh all abee canal!’
Cappo was in high spirits with all the nursery rhyme hijinks.
‘Hungry nah know bam-by,’ concluded Bungi sagely.