Cutting the nose…

Satiricus is a history buff. He was picking up Cappo’s claim that Linden was ‘cutting its nose to spite its face’. It wasn’t ‘spile’ or ‘spoil’, he explained patiently. It was ‘spite’. In the old days when the Vikings used to attack the early European Christian settlements, virtuous women would cut off their noses to make themselves look repulsive and not be hauled away to be ravished. Problem was, when the Vikings left, they remained repulsive looking and could never attract any suitors, much less husbands. Their ‘face’ or honour was saved, but they damaged their looks beyond redemption.
Many of them became nuns.
“Thanks fuh de lecture, Sato,” declared Cappo, not too graciously.
“But whether Linden a ‘spile’ dem face or ‘spite’ dem face, all me know is dat dem hurting nobody but demself.’
“But lemme ask you something, Sato,” said Hari with a smile. “How come the government is the Viking and Linden is the virgin?”
“Well, the government want to raise the electricity charges,” Satiricus replied. “The people in Linden can’t afford to pay.”
“And why they can’t pay?” Suresh wanted to know.
“Jeez, man! Like you don’t live in Guyana or what?” came back Satiricus in a snappy tone.
“The bauxite company had to let go many people years ago. Unemployment high!” “So, de people in Linden helpless like virgin?” Cappo wanted to know.
“Let we come back to that,” advised Hari. “Sato, tell me. So, when the virgins in Linden shut down the bauxite plant, because they’re not turning out to work, what will happen? Satiricus thought a bit about that.
“But they have to let the government know about their hardships!” he protested.
“OK OK But me a come back to yuh Viking and virgin story,” interjected Cappo. “If the government draw back de increase fuh power, but de virgins na gat none job then, how dem guh pay even de small piece?”
“Yes, Sato. Remember how after the virgins cut off their noses, none of the local yahoos would marry them?” prompted Teacher Samad. “Even Linden business people will not invest their money in Linden after what’s going on.”
“What you mean?” inquired Satiricus with some heat. He knew he was being pushed on the backfoot. “I thought the local businesses supporting the protest.”
“Listen budday!!” said Cappo loudly. “Sure de businessmen gon give strike relief. But dem know if de Bosai close down, who gon get money fuh buy from dem?”
“Is pressure make the local business giving,” advised Suresh who had Linden on his salesman route. “Is more ‘tekking’ than ‘giving.’”
“And you have some real bandits holding business people up the interior to ransom,” said Hari.
“Don’t sound like virgins to me, Sato, me friend.” “You cyaan hang yuh hat where yuh hand cyaan reach,” advised Bungi, who’s been listening quietly. “Look how me na wuk de whole out a grinding. Me still had fu pay me light bill. Me just na use de fan, even doh de place hot like hell!’
“Because you na wan virgin,” advised his cane-cutting partner Cappo, as he slapped the wizened Bungi on the shoulder. The table drank to that.