Crime warnings

TIMES INT'L

Satiricus was quite upset: What right have these foreigners to meddle in Guyana’s affairs? “What we do in Guyana was our business, wasn’t it?” he fumed, as he made his way to the Back Street Bar. As he took his seat at the table, where the fellas had already created a decent forest of beer bottles, he blurted his concern aloud even before starting on his beer.
“Calm down, calm down Sato,” said Cappo, as he shoved the bottle towards his friend. “A who yuh a talk ‘bout? De Indian Guvment na invite Nagga Man fuh wan free trip to India?”
“Not really,” replied Satiricus. “But since you brought that up, why didn’t they invite him?”
“Budday! Dem na invite none Minista,” protested Bungi. “An’ he a wan PRIME Minista!!”
“So how come they invited that Attorney General from Jamaica?” Satiricus wanted to know. “She’s a member of the Cabinet.”
“Sato, like you listening to Nagga Man water-boy?” Hari grinned. “Unlike Guyana, the Jamaican AG is not a Minister; she sits in Cabinet just as a legal advisor. They have a separate MINISTER of Justice.”
“Oh!” said Sato. “I always knew Nagga Man water boy was full of it! But I was talking about the US and the British embassies announcing crime is too high here!”
“Suh how da a “inta-ferin’?” Cappo wanted to know. “Dem only warn dem own citizen!”
“But everybody heard!” protested Satiricus. “And it contradicts my fearless leader Rum Jhaat, who said serious crime went down! That is interference!”
“But Sato, if dem British an’ dem American seh crime gaan up,” said Bungi. “Yuh na t’ink dem know somethin’?”
“What could they know?” asked Satiricus exasperatedly. “They get the same facts the police issue.”
“Like you forget the British are advising the police?” asked Hari, as he downed his beer and signalled for another round for all. “They see the figures before Rum Jhaat boys massage them!!”
“Oh!” exclaimed Satiricus. “I better go home early!”

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