Breaking News “Mukracker” granted radio licence

TIMES INT'L

“… Yuh are tuned to MUK Radio on 0.00 FM (Fooling Mechanism). This is de “mukracker” owner he self as DJ (Dirt Joker) welcoming yuh to de only live call-in programme pun radio where yuh gat total freedom of expression. Yuh know we lead and de others follow. That is de trademark of MUK 0.00 FM. Here yuh free to cuss and slander an official or anybody. We play by we rule and de rule is… you know it… is having no rule! So call our cuss line on 752- 6337 (slander) to have yuh cuss out.

And remember we ongoing promotion, for every five cuss, you get a chance to enter our sweepstake to become Cuss Personality of de week! De phone ringing… hello… yuh on to MUK Radio. Caller, “you only want fuh cuss people, what about de transformer that get thief… ” Well, am… we had to cut that caller. A call coming in…. hello…. MUK Radio… Caller, “tell me how yuh get all dem place yuh own…. ” Ah musse cut again…. hello…. Caller, ” tell meh a ting or two about how to robb the taxpayers…. (Dial tone). Caller, “How about Like how you robb de Booker stores and how much for an old Junkie print press? …” ok, plen ty caller, but leh meh mek it clear, de programme is not fuh cuss me, is fuh cuss de officials and dem friends and de Bees. Let we don’t get mix up. The number again, 752- 6337. Another call coming in…. hello… MUK Radio, good- day… Caller, “Hey, Muk, this is Benshap. Congrats for giving the people more crap. What other pro grammes you have?”… Thanks “pander”. Yuh can get some free time to host yuh own programme.

Yuh can tell people how to mek mischief and how to invade offices. MUK Radio gon have different kind ah cuss programme. Freddie will host ” Excretment Everyday” where everybody get a smearing with dat smelly stuff; Adam will host ” Dem Boys Still Cussing”, Link- on will bash about genocide and what mek a woman run and Chrissie Ram will ramble about how to ” hide” figures. So tek yuh pick on this cuss marathon station. Remember if yuh can’t cuss, don’t call. If yuh miss this, yuh can keep up to date with all de cuss in de ” mukracker”. A call coming in… hello, this is de ” mukracker” on MUK 0.00 FM. What yuh want to cuss about? Caller, ” Ah just checking, you programme gon be about ” backtracking”, right?”… cut. Programme done! Ting-a-ling-a-ling… Friend tell friend… mattie tell mattie!

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